Plummeting

I'm preparing myself for rejection on a titanic scale. I'm beginning the application process for just about every job opening in the Greater DC area that sounds interesting.  And when I say "every job" I really do mean it. 

I read something online that said to apply for all the jobs you are interested in, even if you don't necessarily fit all the qualifications. Usually hopelessly realistic, I took the advice seriously and have applied for positions that no one in their right mind would give me, but sound exciting.  Regional Representative for the World Adult Kickball Association? It's only 10 hours a week. And what wouldn't I do to be able to say, "Why yes, I am with WAKA."  An executive with the Royal Bank of Scotland? You can bet I applied for that one.  The very thought of coming in daily contact with men in suits speaking with scottish accents is enough to make the rigorous process of writing 15,000 cover letters worth it. I can't imagine how annoying it will be when I actually have accomplishments to toot my horn about. 

I have a place to stay in DC, rent-free, till I get on my feet with a job and such, so I'm significantly less worried about my future. Since I have a tendency to play worse case scenario with my life, this eases my mind quite a bit. By playing "worst case scenario," I mean that every time I walk down stairs, I see myself plummeting to paralysis. When someone doesn't return my call in a timely fashion, I assume that they have decided to hate me and form groups (with others who don't return my calls) dedicated to discussing all my negative qualities. When I plan to visit a foreign country, I figure a plane crash, political coup d'etat, or nuclear holocaust will make my plans impossible. I basically assume that everything that could possibly go horribly wrong will do just that. But hey, at least I'm never disappointed. Just pleasantly surprised that I have once again evaded failure. Hey, it works for me. It keeps me upbeat.